Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
Randomize
