As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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