Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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