I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
