You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
