I bet he comes in French.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
