I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize