so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize
