Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
