My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
