pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
Randomize
