are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
