I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
