How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
