Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
