But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize