Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
