You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
