So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Randomize
