I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
