Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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