we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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