The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
