its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
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