wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Randomize
