how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Randomize
