Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Randomize
