No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
