I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
