So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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