I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
