I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
