5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
