this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
