I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
