you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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