Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
