my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I AM VODKA MAN
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
