Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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