I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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