my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
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