absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize