Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
