yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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