i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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