In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
