Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
