We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
