we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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