Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
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